As a coach, I connect with other survivors through our shared experience of abuse. Our situations are usually quite different, but the impacts and consequences are so similar – the same stories told in different words.
Connect through experience
We connect through shared experiences of pain and heartache, of silence and hiddenness, of shame and guilt. And we also connect through shared determination and persistence, shared courage and compassion.. We also connect through a shared desire to rebuild lives afresh.
Most of us do not play ‘my trauma is worse than your trauma’ drama games. Triggers still occur from relatively small events. However, those triggering times are less intense and less frequent as time goes on.
And most of us seek to use those difficult experiences as sources of wisdom to share with others.
Connect to self again
Australian anti-domestic violence campaigner, Rosie Batty’s, recently decided to close her son Luke’s foundation, disperse its funds to other charities. She wants to focus on her on health and well-being, This decision is an example of the ongoing cost of abuse. Even when the experience of abuse is used for incredibly positive ends the need for self-care is so necessary.
I wish Rosie well in her time of looking after herself. Others will take up the baton because, sadly, domestic violence and domestic abuse isn’t going away. In ten days in Australia in early October, eight women died violently at the hands of someone they knew or had been in an intimate relationship with.
That’s only the tip of the iceberg. So many people suffer in silence behind closed doors, as their partner abuses them financially, emotionally, mentally, sexually or spiritually. Abuse is real – whether there are physical scars to show for it or not.
Connect to wholeness
Healing and wholeness post-abuse is also real too. Abuse shapes you, but it doesn’t define you. In abuse you bury your dreams in order to survive, and you can recover them. Despite its awfulness, abuse births superpowers that can uncovered and unleashed.
Have you been out of an abuse environment for more than two years? Are you sensing that the time is right to make some real steps forward in rebuilding your life? Then accept a complimentary copy of The Six Pillars of Thriving. Just leave your details below and it’s yours.
Be powered by your past!